Possumblog

Back from the D&PS!

That is, the Dog and Pony Show. And no, no actual dogs nor ponies were used in the show.

Three hour meeting, in which my portion came near the front, and consisted of approximately 4 minutes of expository matter, after which I sat back down and waited to leave. Which I couldn't do until the meeting was over.

Got here just in time to go to the bank and to lunch, so I strolled over to the AmSouth Harbert Center, went to the bank, saw that it was full to capacity with other people who'd come to the bank, and decided it would be best to eat lunch first, then try the bank later.

So, I ate lunch. It's always a bad thing when I sit down and stay awhile to eat, because I invariably find myself being highly critical of everyone's fashion choices.

Yes, I realize I have absolutely no room to criticize.

But doggone it, I say you shouldn't wear cheap rubber sandles and clamdiggers to the office if you want people to think of you as a professional.

I think that if you look like the Unabomber you probably should try for a slightly different look. Maybe shave the beard, or comb your hair different, or quit staring at people with your weird, spaced out eyes.

Those tiny little Peter Rabbit coats that the gals are wearing aren't really attractive, but even less so on women who are well past their teen years.

Guys shouldn't wear "product" in their hair.

If you're a girl, and your legs are pasty, ashy, pocky, veiny, lumpy, bulgy, stubbly, saggy, scratched, scarred, bruised, or any combination thereof, it would really look better if you wore hose of some sort. Sorry--I know it might seem like a double standard, but everyone pretty much expects guy's legs to be hideous looking. Of course, this doesn't mean guys should have free rein to wear shorts. Or skirts, for that matter.

If you are a woman and simply MUST have a tattoo, could you at least make it something nice-looking? Something that works with your body's normal bilateral symmetry? Something remotely feminine? I mean, you might like giant block letter prison tats covering your ham-like arms and your wallowing, uncontrolled, watermelon-sized bosoms, but really, it doesn't do a lot to convince people you aspire to greatness.

I realize the current fashion is for closely fitted clothing, but ladies, there's a difference between fitted and looking like your being squeezed out of a Play-Doh Fun Factory.

Men should not wear hibiscus-print Hawaiian motif fleece pullovers anywhere in the continental United States.

There now. I feel all better now.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at March 31, 2006 02:06 PM