November 23, 2005

Thursday Three!?

Not today, bucko!

Since none of you should be hanging around a computer tomorrow TODAY we're going to have a make-do diversion with a Weevilicious Wednesday One, to whit:

Name ONE traditional Thanksgiving food that you would be satisfied to NEVER EVER eat again!

As is always the case with these competitions, we ask you to either leave your answer in the comments below or a link to your blog, so we can all come over to your place and sit around in a sleepy daze on the couch with our pants unbuttoned.

Everyone can play, even if you're some kinda heathern and don't celebrate Thanksgiving.


Giblet gravy. My mother in law, God love her, makes giblet gravy every year. I cannot tell you how nauseated the sight of lumps of liver and heart and lights and boiled eggs in a rich brown gravy makes me. The sight, the smell--simply overwhelming. I love gravy, don't get me wrong, but I can do without all the sweetbreads. I like meat meat, not organ meat.

It took many years, but now she will set aside for me a little bit of gravy sans offal.

AND, although I didn't ask for TWO choices, if I had a second choice it would be cranberry sauce. I used to love it, but I just don't care for it anymore. I don't know if it's the flavor, which isn't really that bad, or the texture, which isn't really that bad, or if it's the slimy gloppy nature of it when it comes easing out of the can with all of the ridges and rings intact and plops onto a plate that seems to suggest not so much a gelled fruit condiment, but rather a slice from a giant dark earthworm.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at November 23, 2005 07:59 AM

You know, there are other kinds of cranberry sauce besides canned. Many fewer lines, a bit less gloppy.

I can't really think of anything that I could do without, though the idea of adding marshmallows to anything other than s'mores or rice krispy treats is kind of gross.

Oh. And anything embedded in Jello other than more jello.

Posted by: skinnydan at November 23, 2005 08:10 AM

Oh, I know that, and YOU know that, but somehow there are some others who think that the worm-segment variety is just about the best thing on earth.

My mother used to make a cranberry relish that was heavenly. She won't make it anymore, though, because it's too much trouble.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at November 23, 2005 08:41 AM

I don't mind cranberry juice or cranberry muffins, but I can do without the cranberry sauce. Yeah, I know there's good "home-y" recipes that beats the stuff plopped out of the can, I just don't like it, none. I keep it off my Thanksgiving platter.

If you don't like the giblets gravy and that "sweet" organ scent (it puts the sweet in sweetbread), are you OK with giblets in the dressing? Or are you one of those fans of cornbread stuffin' with nuts and other items but no giblets?

[Hmmm, one more question to make the Wednesday Weversal. Have you tried the new Thanksgiving treat Aardposlow? You take an aardvark (de-gutted, de-armored, declawed and deboned), stuff a skinned possum inside (tail optional), then stuff a swallow (European or African?) inside the possum. Plenty of giblets there for gravy and dressing.]

Posted by: MarcV at November 23, 2005 09:31 AM

Gobble Gobble!

Posted by: skillzy at November 23, 2005 09:31 AM

I'm with skinnydan. In my old age, I care nothing at all for marshmallows in anything -- especially those ruining perfectly good sweet potatoes or fruit salad.

Posted by: Janis Gore at November 23, 2005 09:52 AM

Turnips and squash. But my Yankee wife will continue to serve them.

Posted by: steevil (Dr Weevil's bro Steve) at November 23, 2005 09:58 AM

Marc--no giblets, anytime, anywhere. Not even those of an African swallow.

And yes, I want my stuffing/dressing to be cornbread, with no nuts. Little big of sage, little bit of pepper, little bit of salt. The andouille recipe I linked to the other day sounds good, too.

Marshmallows annoy me, but they don't make me wretch and heave the way I do with giblets.

Turnips? Turnip greens are okay, and collards, and mustard greens, but the turnips themselves are just too blechy. Worse are those mean people who mash them up to look like mashed potatoes. Squash? Mmmm.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at November 23, 2005 10:06 AM

I like turnips, but Lyman doesn't.

Rutabagas are even better.

Posted by: Janis at November 23, 2005 10:08 AM

Ok I have an answer up :-)

Posted by: Chez at November 23, 2005 10:22 AM

Before I join in on the great “what not to put in food debate” I think I’ll answer the question. [drum roll please]
Turkey dark meat. Don’t like the look or the taste or the texture, in fact I would rather have the parts Terry leaves out.
As to the other topic: I can take marshmallows but please leave the raisins out of everything. A perfectly good carrot salad can be ruined by the addition of even one raisin.

Posted by: jim at November 23, 2005 10:25 AM

Well, what about those rilly kewl Ocean Spray Craisins?

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at November 23, 2005 10:34 AM

Chez, we'll have a can of jellied cranberry sauce for Lyman. He likes that best.

(Deprived law school years, I say.)

Posted by: Janis at November 23, 2005 10:37 AM

Craisins. Mmmm the taste of cranberries and the texture of raisins. All you would need is hot sauce to form gastronomic napalm.

Posted by: jim at November 23, 2005 10:52 AM

Maybe some dried habaneros...

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at November 23, 2005 10:55 AM

Skinnydan, how do you prepare a kosher turkey?

You can't baste with butter, can you? Or can you?

Posted by: Janis at November 23, 2005 11:15 AM

I saw that Israel is the world’s leader in turkey consumption. So there must be some way to get it kosher and right.

Posted by: jim at November 23, 2005 11:47 AM

Is the dairy-meat prohibition restricted to animals that nurse? The scripture is something about not seething the lamb in the milk of its mother.

Posted by: Janis at November 23, 2005 11:50 AM

Here is my slice of Thanksgiving no-no's.

Posted by: Sarah G. at November 23, 2005 12:12 PM

Thanks for asking the easy ones, Janis. :P First, find out what kind of yeshiva the turkey went to; check out the length of his sideburns, his lineage...

Then grill that bad boy up.

Actually, you do have to leave out the butter, but olive oil is fine. Other than the dairy restriction, the turkey needs to be slaughtered in accordance with standard religious practices for fowl.

As far as the meat/dairy thing, there was a rabbi in Babylonia (probably ca. 400 CE, give or take) who believed that chicken was not considered meat, much as we don't treat fish as meat. That was a minority opinion, so we do treat fowl as under the meat/dairy prohibition.

Interestingly (well, to me anyway) there was debate when Jews first arrived in America as to whether or not Turkey was a kosher bird, among those described in Leviticus. The end result was that it was deemed kosher, or else I'd be eating plain old chicken tomorrow.

WAY, WAY, WAY too much information on the kashrut of Turkey (the bird, not the country) can be found here.

Posted by: skinnydan at November 23, 2005 12:37 PM

Thank you, sir.

Posted by: Janis at November 23, 2005 12:56 PM

Sweet Potatoes. I never did care for them in any form or fashion.

Anything made from pumpkins. (Although the dried seeds are good.)

Raisins in anything.

Anything but marshmallows in Jell-O.

There's no priority there, any one of them is a no-no.

Posted by: Eric at November 23, 2005 02:47 PM

Well; here's my 2 cents. Happy Thanksgiving all!

Posted by: Lita at November 23, 2005 04:37 PM

Grr. Can't tell if the link works; here it is--

Posted by: Lita at November 23, 2005 04:39 PM