Possumblog

Two posts in one week!?

Well, I can't help myself--I got home yesterday to an excited bunch of kids who informed me I had a package on the doorstep, all the way from Utah! (The package, not the doorstep.)

Obviously, my first thought was that it was a package of lovely collectible Marie Osmond dolls as well as a torrid love note and several naughty pictures (like I get from her every year). However, when I saw the return address, I knew it must be something even better--and it was! It was from the Axis of Weevil's own Ambassador to the Beehive State, Nate McCord!

I busted open the box and was attacked by one of these little cuties. After prying its vicious snarling teeth off of my arm, I noticed the enclosed note:

Terry, the possum's a little gift for you that I just couldn't pass up.

I hope you and your family have a blessed and spiritual Christmas.

Merry Christmas to all your Oglesby clan from the Utah chapter of the Axis of Weevil.

Nate

Many thanks to Nate, although since the children saw this, I might not get to play with it as much as I'd like. Still, it is much appreciated and gets a special place of honor alongside the silver Johnny Lightning Corvette Sting Ray.

Also of interest was the little hangtag that came with the animal, full of intriguing facts about opossums. Did you know:

The opossum hideouts are located in a variety of areas including stumps, haystacks, vine tangles, attics, garages, road culverts, hollow trees, rock piles, crannies, under buildings, and in the abandoned burrows of other animals.

Okay, well, I do like the garage. It's really difficult to keep a rolling toolbox and do any kind of engine work in a hollow tree.

Opossums are not territorial and do not maintain separate home ranges.

First I've heard of that. I guess I should quit walking around my house marking my property line with pee.

They are exceptionally non-aggressive and non-destructive. They will not harm people or pets.

Yeah, right. You just keep thinking that, m'kay?

They are more immune to many diseases than the other animals and are far less likely to carry rabies.

That frothing at the mouth? Just root beer foam.

Opossums are beneficial to the environment because they eat pests, snails, and slugs.

Lemme tell you, it's not easy bein' green.

They have a remarkable resistance to poisonous snakebite such as the rattlesnake, cottonmouth, Russell's viper, and Asiatic cobra.

I credit my remarkable resistance to snakebite to be the result of being scared of them enough to not get bitten.

Opossums do not hibernate, and they are active at night.

That's why you see so many possums at all-night raves.

ANYway, that's your possum fix for the year. Thanks once more to Nate for making this all possible!

Posted by Terry Oglesby at December 23, 2008 09:47 AM