March 27, 2007

The Ultimate Global Warming Conundrum

Lack of ice set to kill start of Canadian seal hunt

YAY! No evil baby seal clubbers!

But all the baby seals are drowned!

But at least they won't be exploited for their pretty fur!

But this is wiping out the lifestyle of an indigenous people!

It has that whole "mother-sister-mother" vibe from Chinatown.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at March 27, 2007 02:13 PM
Comments

So Global Warming is good? I am so confused. I know that as a caring person, I am supposed to be against hunting seals and that was pretty easy for me since we don't seem to have any seals around here so the ice thing would seem to be good.

Oh, the confusion!

Posted by: Larry Anderson at March 27, 2007 02:34 PM

And we might as well dump a little Darwinism in here and say the seals had it coming either way.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at March 27, 2007 02:58 PM

Oh that's cold!

Posted by: Larry Anderson at March 27, 2007 03:13 PM

::sigh:: No, Larry, No.

Let's start over.

NOT cold. WARM. All Earth is warm, melting into large puddle of goo before Thanksgiving. Nothing will be left of humanity, which is all we deserve for being alive.

Time to go back and read "Earth In the Balance" by the preeminent genius and prophet of our time, where he tells you what's wrong with you for wanting to eat and sleep while the world becomes awful.

LOOK!! A MANBEARPIG!!!

Posted by: skinnydan at March 27, 2007 03:34 PM

So, you're saying it's okay to club baby Manbearpigs?

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at March 27, 2007 03:39 PM

(Which, I suppose, would be called Babycubpiglets.)

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at March 27, 2007 03:40 PM

No. Not at all. Shame on you.

I meant it's perfectly okay to club Al Gore. I recommend a Louisville Slugger, though a 5-wood would probably be acceptable as well.

Posted by: skinnydan at March 28, 2007 07:53 AM

Now, Dan, you KNOW that's not nice. Although Albert, Jr. is lovable and cuddly and would make a good meal for an orca, he is NOT an acceptable substitute for a baby fur seal. And anyway, since he's MADE out of wood, hitting him with something wooden wouldn't do too much harm.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at March 28, 2007 10:09 AM

I apologize for my insensitivity.

Although, they do make aluminum bats and titanium golf clubs...

And routers and circular saws and cordless drills...

Posted by: skinnydan at March 28, 2007 10:41 AM

Black & Decker even makes a dandy little cordless circular saw.

Posted by: Janis Gore at March 28, 2007 11:08 AM

There--much better use of resources!

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at March 28, 2007 11:26 AM