January 25, 2007

Canonical List of Suggestions.

Still trying to figure out what to get the missus. From past posts, we have the following: sparkly things; a trip to the spa; flowers; 500 parrots; a fake dragon tattoo; some pie; a new oven and a fancy set of copper cookware; a different-coloured Volvo; top line chocolates; an oven where the "broil" setting is actually only 350; a $100 pair of shoes; time with me on one Friday night a month for the next three months with grandparents providing kid-sitting while Miss Reba and I head out for dinner, movies, concerts, or walks in the park; a full body massage, or if that's immodest for her, a spa day, without Oldest; and finally, a Thumper Pro Massager.

Very good suggestions, and I really need to decide on something.

I was very excited yesterday evening when she said she was going to get to take tomorrow off from work. Because I am incredibly selfish, thoughts of a intemperately naughty nature started cropping up almost immediately, most of which revolved around me surprising her at home sometime during the day, playing the role of either the Handsome Furnace Repairman or the Handsome Pizza Delivery Boy or the Handsome Sailor Returning From Sea Duty or the Handsome Secret Agent/Low Level Bureaucrat.

One of the kids asked her what she was going to do tomorrow. She said she was going to clean out her closet.

Suddenly, I found myself in a quandary. Although I do enjoy the random romp, she REALLY needs to clean out that closet. She's got stuff from Christmas still hanging all over every door and doorknob in our bedroom, and you can't walk through the door without knocking something off the hangers, and the closet's been a mess for months, and she keeps saying how she needs time to clean it out and I really would like for her to have some quiet time to...hmm?


What's that, Miss Reba?


Well, I see.

That makes my schedule for tomorrow much more clear.

You see, as I was pondering all of this conflict in my head, she informed me that she'd gotten another present yesterday.

The same present she gets every 28 days.

I think, then, that tomorrow I shall leave her alone in peace with her closet-cleaning, and maybe pick up a nice cake on the way home.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at January 25, 2007 10:46 AM

Better make it chocolate.

Posted by: Sarah G. at January 25, 2007 11:02 AM

Well, here's the deal. She's trying to wean herself off chocolate because it causes her stomach and other innards to act up. I'm thinking a nice yellow cake with white icing.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 25, 2007 11:09 AM

Well then that's a no go.

Your cake sounds good, how about a few fresh strawberries on top to jazz it up?

Posted by: Sarah G. at January 25, 2007 01:08 PM

That might work--I'll have to see what they have at the Wal-Mart bakery. ;)

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 25, 2007 01:19 PM

So, how many kids you figure will need a sick day tomorrow?

Posted by: Janis Gore at January 25, 2007 01:38 PM

None. They might wheedle and try to stay home, but by gum, they're a'going.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 25, 2007 01:40 PM

Oooh, pick up a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting - yummy.

Get the shoes, then hold them back. Friday night give her a foot bath followed by a foot massage. Don't worry about girding your loins. The honeys love to have their feet pampered, particularly when you are groveling at their feet.

After she's feeling the foot love, slip the Manolo's (or whatever you can get on sale) on her. Just put a bow around the box - half the thrill for them is seeing the name on the box.

Posted by: Marc V at January 25, 2007 02:25 PM

Believe it or not, we just got through with a cake we made for the lunch at church on Saturday and it was a spice cake with cream cheese icing. Not quite a carrot cake, since it didn't have carrot, but otherwise pretty much the same.

AS FOR SHOES, I hate to be such a spoilsport, but I think her collection would make Imelda Marcos gasp in disbelief.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 25, 2007 02:32 PM

Well, I guess I was imprinting my wishes on you. I would love to do that for my wife, but bling-bling is a far-off thing. At least we're rich in love.

Posted by: Spud at January 25, 2007 08:47 PM