August 02, 2006

Worst Job in Birmingham

I complain a lot, but only due to lack of perspective.

Things tend to clarify themselves, however.

Driving back from my noontime car parts escapade (about which, more later) up 20th Street, or as we like to call it, Birmingham Green. Temperature at noon today, 92 degrees; relative humidity, 50%; winds, calm. (For you punishment gluttons and RealFeeltm fans, that's like 111!)

Up ahead I see a giant cup with the Quiznos logo on the side, walking along the sidewalk. Upon closer viewing, I see that it is not just a giant cup, but a giant 8 foot high cup costume with a person inside, walking up and down the sidewalk to entice people to visit the Quiznos on the other side of the street so that passersby might partake of some sort of icy frozen concoction vended therein. A frozen concoction that manifested itself by a simulacrum of frost heaped up on top of the cup costume with the obligatory straw.

Give the body credit, though--he was in full peppy jittery mascot mode, prancing and preening with all his cupful might--bobbing, and weaving, and waving, and gamboling. He WAS the cup.

Thank goodness it wasn't as hot today as it usually is.

And thank goodness it wasn't me.

AS FOR THE HOSE--I went and got the car, parked right outside the parts department, had Bob Uecker come out, and he proceeded to look very carefully at everything before pronouncing himself confused. Went back inside to look on the computer, and was further stymied and baffled. Seems the hose left the throttle body, arced down, went around, and ended somewhere near Tijuana. Althought this was not a certainty, and it could just as easily been closer to Calgary.

By this time, I had already decided what I was going to do. He wanted to order the hose he thought it might be, but I told him I would hate for him to order it and it be the wrong thing. He said it would be simple to send it back, but my REAL objection was the added frustration of having to bring the car by AGAIN and it possibly STILL not be the right part.

"Tell you what I'm gonna do--before I have you order that, I'm going to do this--I'm going to cut off the leaky end of that hose and clamp it back on there and see if that works."

"Hmm--yep--that'd be a good idea!"

Thanks. Although it still seems like it would be a better idea to have a shop manual somewhere close by to look things like this up, but I realize that to do so would be to penetrate the veil that hangs between the service department and parts department, and it could lead to a cosmic cataclysm.


Posted by Terry Oglesby at August 2, 2006 01:31 PM

In the 21122 zip code, Pasadena, MD (where I keep my boat) it's 101.8 deg at the moment.

Posted by: steevil (Dr Weevil's bro Steve) at August 2, 2006 01:47 PM

I can't believe a parts place wouldn't have access to online shop manuals. They are probably scared to give their employees Internet access for fear of porn surfing or [shudder] blogging!

Posted by: skillzy at August 2, 2006 02:07 PM

I think it's to make sure that if something's wrong, you're encouraged to go get it fixed at the service department. If just regular customers could look and find out what's wrong, why, they might go FIX IT THEMSELVES!

It's a mixed up crazy world.

And Steevil's a show-off.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at August 2, 2006 02:28 PM

Hah!Here in north NOLA both Saturday and Sunday hit the one houndred mark. Sunday beat that by 3.7ºf. I think that I will once again hide in the walk in freezer if it even gets close to 95ºf. Fat ol chefs and heat don't mix.

Posted by: Tony von Krag at August 2, 2006 06:39 PM


Posted by: Terry Oglesby at August 3, 2006 07:53 AM

A little cooler today in Pasadena, 100.9 deg.

Posted by: steevil (Dr Weevil's bro Steve) at August 3, 2006 01:08 PM

It's 138 here today. And we have a plague of locusts.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at August 3, 2006 01:09 PM

Well it's low 90s in Vermont.
At least it cools down at night.

Posted by: Sarah G. at August 3, 2006 01:16 PM

I think it's all the snow that does it.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at August 3, 2006 01:18 PM