Walked down 19th Street to the corner of 4th Avenue. Two toughs loitering--both had clipboards. Not good. I think one even had elbow patches on his tweed blazer.
I got closer, then one raised his hand, as if to wave a greeting. Without thinking, I quickly withdrew my service pencil, dropped into a modified Weaver stance, and shouted at the miscreants, "FREEZE--I AM A MUNICIPAL AGENT! I HAVE A PENCIL, AND I WILL USE IT!"
After making sure the area was secure and they were sufficiently scared of my scariness, I roughed them up a bit just for sport--"Who ARE you!?" that pleaded as I fanned them with a deck of color samples. "Me? I'm the Pretty Police--NOW SHUT UP!"
I poked one of them with my pencil for effect.
Not really.
We had a sign go up in the wrong place on a building, and I was there to offer suggestions for fixing it, and to offer veiled threats of the consequences of noncompliance. Which theoretically are pretty high, in that they can result in some hefty fines levied by a city judge, and possibly a tardy note that will be placed on the person's permanent record. Luckily, the owner was there, and he was ticked off at the installer, who was not the most careful person, it turns out.
One word of advice to folks--be sure you have your documentation. The big fellow who was most likely to be losing some money on the deal (i.e., the contractor) seemed as though he might be reaching out to see if he could slide some slices of blame onto someone else's plate. But you see, when I have the drawing right there with me, and when I can remind you that I called and TOLD you the day of the installation it was wrong and you needed to stop but you went ahead and did it anyway, and when your client is standing there tapping his foot, well, not only do you not get to put that slice of blame off on anyone else, you also wind up with an extra serving of gristle. Gristle is bad, and is best avoided.
And remember, although I am nothing more than a menial civil servant, I have learnt at the feet of masters in the art of CYA.
Anyway, we got it worked out and it'll be better than before, so that's nice, and it makes little kittens purr. Awww. Kittens!
Now then, more work to do.
Posted by Terry Oglesby at March 7, 2006 10:35 AM