January 13, 2006

Having just returned from the food court...

...and being well known for my sartorial magnificence, I offer these fashion tips.

Women's fishnet hosiery--most especially the kind with the very very wide network--is appropriate in approximately two scenarios, neither of which involve going to the food court. Further, neither scenario calls for wearing a pair of big ugly tennis shoes or a denim skirt, most especially when the entire garb is intended to be worn as office attire. Finally, the ankle tattoo does not help.

Straight men--I am pained to tell you this, but the whole woodsy, urban cowboy thing, with the leather Crocodile Dundee hat and the Marlboro Man sideburns and Levis is going to have to be put away for awhile, at least until Clint Eastwood makes another movie about cowboys in which they only kiss women or their horses. Further, attempting to macho it up by leering at various women as they pass by your table will not work right now, because most women will think you're admiring their shoes.

That's the bad--the good? There is something very attractive about a redhead wearing a green dress. I don't know if it's the color clash complement (thanks, Miss Janis) or what, but it looks really, really good.

Other good things? Chicken. Mmmm. Chicken is good.

SO, there you go.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at January 13, 2006 01:30 PM

you saw me at the food court?

Posted by: DaveH at January 13, 2006 01:52 PM

Complementary colors on the redhead in the green dress, not clash.

My sister, the very attractive fake redhead, could help you there.

Posted by: Janis at January 13, 2006 01:54 PM

Dang it--and I know that! You are exactly right.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 13, 2006 02:05 PM

And Dave, I'm sorry, but those hose just don't suit you.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at January 13, 2006 02:08 PM