October 19, 2005

Yet more unsolicited marketing advice.

Just went out for lunch, and after successfully running the bum's gantlet, I noted two people up on the corner of 20th Street wearing sandwich boards handing out literature of some sort.

::sigh::

All of the intrusiveness of people begging for money, combined with personal signage.

Oh well.

Got closer, and found that they were with the downtown YMCA, and were handing out free passes. Which was kinda nice. But.

See, one of the people was a pretty young slim blonde girl of the sort who would look good wearing anything, including two corrugated-core plastic boards.

The other person? A guy. But not the macho, rugged sort of man who likes the Y for its wide selection of exercise opportunities and naked men, but a fellow who was the exact size and shape of a barrel. It seems that if you're trying to tout the benefits of joining a health club of some sort, it would be good to have folks who look less like a giant meatball sandwich.

Just saying.

After turning down the coupon (I don't feel so bad about that, seeing as how the bum who was following me turned it down, too), I went on over to AmSouth Harbert to get some lunch.

Went back to Wall Street Deli for the second day in a row, with the intent of getting a salad. (Not prompted by the need to look less like a giant meatball sandwich myself, mind you--I knew what I wanted beforehand.) As I was walking in, I noticed the sign above the salad bar, in particular the line in red letters above the big price numerals:

Good Things Last FOREVER!

Well, that's nice. But you get to thinking about it, and a salad bar probably isn't the best place to display that slogan, given that the average lifespan of chopped lettuce is about two days. If good things last forever, bad things must not, therefore lettuce and its little salad bar friends must be bad, too. With the exception of the tiny ham cubes, which have enough nitrites and BHT in them to last well into the afterlife. THOSE are good things.

So, I filled up my plate with ham cubes.

Posted by Terry Oglesby at October 19, 2005 01:17 PM
Comments

I guess there weren't any Twinkies on the salad bar? Be cause those will definitely be around long after we're all gone too.

Posted by: Jordana at October 19, 2005 02:00 PM

You are what you eat, so if you eat enough preservatives ...

Could the Cornaguin(tm) line be extended to insects, so that you could sprinkle something like Cornahoppers on your salad in place of croutons? There may be some people who would not like insects in their salad bar, though other cultures consider insects a delicacy.

Is "bum" PC? How about "person of inadequate means and motivation"? Financially-challenged?
[Uh-oh, that's hitting a little too close to home for me.]

Posted by: MarcV at October 19, 2005 02:21 PM