Possumblog

And speaking of birds...

...there comes this: Scrushy movie in negotiations, his lawyers say

Dickie Bird Fills the Silver Screen! I can hardly wait. But on to the "story"--

Friday, September 16, 2005

RUSSELL HUBBARD

News staff writer

Lights, camera - Scrushy!

Reminds me of the "Just JACK!" line from Will and Grace, but whatever.

Richard Scrushy lawyers Donald Watkins and Jim Parkman say they are in talks with Hollywood screenwriters and movie producers interested in turning their story into a feature-length film.

"We have met with directors and actors well known to the American public," Watkins said. "It is a David vs. Goliath story, and a tale of seemingly divergent personalities coming together to win the battle nobody said could be won."

Using millions of dollars paid by the defendant; dollars gained in what even the defense acknowledges was a massive fraud scheme. Meaning that the proceeds paid to the defendant for his salary, and stock options, and loans, and various other honoraria and love offerings wasn't actually fairly gotten, and, in fact belong to the people who were defrauded. But hey, WHO CARES! GREAT PICTURE IDEA, right!?

About two weeks ago, the pair met in Hollywood with star actor James Woods and Todd Slater, executive producer of the 2004 film biography of musician Ray Charles, Watkins said. Also at the table were Rodney Stone, who produced the 1991 biography of basketball star "Pistol Pete" Maravich, and Harry Thomasson, a Bill Clinton confidante and co-creator of the 1980s television hit "Designing Women."

Meetings with potential screenwriters are scheduled later this month.

"Hollywood figures are gripped by this story that played out in Birmingham," Watkins said. [...]

I've no doubt Hollywood figures are gripped, which says a lot about Hollywood, doesn't it?

I will say this, though--James Woods? If he's in it for the Dick role, that's GOLD, BABY! No one plays oily megalomaniacal psychopaths quite so well! Except for maybe Chris Walken. AND you got some Clinton pie in there, too?! Pure, solid, 24k GOLD!

"Anything dramatic is of potential interest to audiences," said Richard Walter, chairman of the screenwriting program at the UCLA school of theater, film and television. "Great dramatic art always has memorable characters."

The Scrushy tale might qualify.

I sense a very large contribution going to the UCLA school of theater, film, and television. It is something of a leap, however, to go from memorable character straight to great dramatic art. Using them together in the same sentence doesn't guarantee results. I mean, just look at Weekend at Bernie's Two.

The former CEO flew airplanes, played in bar bands and said he wanted to be the highest-paid executive in corporate America while running HealthSouth. Lawyers Watkins and Parkman also put their ample personalities on display during the trial.

To put it mildly.

Walter, whose students include the screenwriters of "Sideways" and "War of The Worlds," said the corporate/courtroom thriller hasn't lost steam with film studios.

`A nice-lookin' fellow':

"It's tried and true, a perennial," he said. "That genre will never go away."

Translation? "I'm telling you it hasn't lost steam so you won't believe what you're seeing from box office receipts. Because you know that, and I know that, but HE doesn't know that, and if there's that much walking around cash to spread around, why shouldn't it go to a few deserving members of the creative community, right? Right!"

Scrushy has also had feelers about movies, the former CEO said.

You know, I have always thought of him as having feelers, and now it has been confirmed. OOOOH!! I know--another creapy greasy guy like maybe Jeff Goldblum! You know, that fly movie he made!? You could have him be like, a hospital CEO, and he's like, rich, and does experiments, and a fly lands in some test tube, then on him, and he starts turning into a fly, and the FBI arrests him for insider trading and stuff, and he hires a lawyer, and in court, the CEO starts turning into a fly and Tom Cruise is there and he starts screaming and OOOOH! Catherine Zeta-Jones! Her and Tom Cruise are a legal team, and they've got to defend him because the FBI and the Securities and Exchange Commission are trying to railroad him because they want to steal the secret fly formula so they can find Osama Bin Laden, so they want him in jail or a box or something, and Catherine Zeta-Jones starts falling in love with him, but he looks at her and says something about even though he's rich, he'll still be turning into a fly all the time, and she is conflicted, because Tom Cruise tells her that they have a duty to defend him but he thinks he might just be misleading them about the fly experiments and so then they have Joe Peschi come in and he plays like the guy who was the lawyer in My Cousin Vinny, and they manage to all get the fly CEO off, and the FBI gives him his own private island in exchange for the formula. GOLD, BABY!

"We've had people call us," he said. "We've been approached by various agents and people who have a relationship with that."

Scrushy added that he doesn't know who should portray him, but that it should "probably be a nice-lookin' fellow."

Well, that's just so true. And let's hope they find someone who looks good no matter if he's wearing a cowboy hat, mullet and cheesy mustache, or nice slick Pat Riley hair.

As for Watkins and Parkman, they plan to retain significant editorial control over any project they assent to, possibly as co-producers. That's because they want to tell the story of the relationships between the lawyers and their winning strategies, as well as the more oft-heard tales of corporate excess and greed the former finance chiefs described on the witness stand.

"The interesting thing is how we all came together from different legal backgrounds and won the case," Parkman said. [...]

Ummmyeah. Anyway, there probably needs to be a car chase, too. Like having the fly driving really fast through town to get away from the Feds. 'Cause that's really important to the story, too, you know. Oh, and we probably need to find a way to get some cleavage in here, too.

[...] Neither Parkman nor Watkins plan to appear in the film, although Watkins said Denzel Washington "would be about the right fit" to play him.

Or possibly the mechanical shark from Jaws.

Anyway, it should be quite the thriller. OOOOH!! MICHAEL JACKSON COMEBACK VEHICLE! He could play Watkins! GOLD, BABY!

Posted by Terry Oglesby at September 16, 2005 12:05 PM